Free at last!

I’m free! Free at last!

Free from the shackles of 9 to 5, from the unreasonable demands of crazy bosses, from the closed-toe shoe hell I was living.

Hello waking up late, hello Birkenstocks, and hello new boss—ME!

Uuuuhhh… OK, now what?

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Actually I’ve been free for almost a year now. It has just taken a long, long time to sink in.

I resigned from my last real day job last May.

So now that I have all this free time, I guess it would only make sense to use it, huh?

I guess. But! I am almost ashamed to say that I haven’t done much in the intervening time. However, since I refuse to be cowed by public opinion (and, more importantly, by the contrabida little voice in my head), I will let all that go and start from square one. Right here, right now.

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A rundown of the activities I would like to devote my time to:

1. My work fallbacks

Chicken that I admit I am, I have not completely severed ties to the normal working world. I have two semi-day jobs, as it were. Both are in line with what I envision for my future, so that’s OK. Both pay well enough in terms of industry standards.

The first is insurance and mutual fund sales. I’m keeping mum about this, since there are sensitive topics lurking all around. Suffice it to say that I carry on happily, and I try hold my own as a non-makulit sales person. I think many people appreciate that.

The second is part time teaching for summer enrichment programs for students. I am in training for this one, and I have high hopes for my first class in April.

So yes, I still cling to some semblance of security in the form of paid employment. But not too much.

2. My long-term career path

All this means is that I need to take and pass my board exam if I ever want to be an architect. Not something I am really looking forward to, and it shows by the amount of study time I have put into it. But a necessary evil, and something I have already put off once.

That said, I still have not begun to study in earnest, and I still do not have my clearance, or my transcript, or my diploma, or any of the other requirements. And the deadline of June 9^th looms nearer. Aaargh!

3. My newfound interests

In a word, the internet (wait, that’s two words…). Being online and being able to vent some creative energy into what I’m doing has been very helpful. Now I want to learn more and reach a wider audience with different material. I’m working for that to materialize soon!!!

4. The work of my dreams

I’ll keep this to myself for now. Baka maudlot. Hehe.

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I wonder about the number of people I know who say they hate work but continue to do it. I also wonder at the people who love their work, and I long to be one of them. This is part of that effort.

Part of my quest to be happy (chronicled in my blog, Seekers Anonymous) is finding my right livelihood. I believe that that livelihood does not need to be achieved working for somebody else.

I give myself permission to experiment.

And I give myself permission to take things one day at a time.

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I find the vernacular term “kinakarir” (as in, “kinakarir nya na ang panonood ng PBB”) very amusing. Directly translated, it means “to make a career of”. No talk of money or salary there. Whatever we make a career of in this sense, we do because we want to. We devote ourselves to something. Not everybody will understand, and many say it to jeer at the devotion in question. But we do it anyway.

So, ayan, kinarir ko na ang pagsusulat. And whatever I do now, I can treat with much the same devotion that I used to reserve for work. After all, isn’t that precisely what I freed myself to do?